So tonight at small group, I heard a really interesting statement. It was actually a recap from last week's study [which i happened to miss], and they were talking about learning stuff in church. Like that feeling you get when you leave a service on Sunday morning and feel really motivated and inspired by what the pastor says, but then by the time Sunday evening rolls around you've already forgotten what the pastor said that was so great.
Anyways, what the girls said was something along the lines of:
"It's like when you look in the mirror and see that your hair is messed up. Of course you aren't going to walk away with your hair still a mess; instead you're going to fix it. It should be the same way with church. You shouldn't be okay with seeing something wrong in your life but walking away and leaving that part of you a mess. Instead, you should take it as a hint of things you need to fix, and change it immediately, just like you would your hair."
How great is that?! It's so true! At least for me it is. It seems like every single Sunday I leave church feeling so so inspired and encouraged to change myself for Christ, but I immediately forget. No matter how motivated or convicted I feel, I always allow myself to go back to however I was before without a second thought. This is so ridiculous! If I am clearly seeing something that is against what God wants and isn't compatible with Jesus' teachings, then why should I allow myself to continue down that path?
So many times I hear something great and realize an area in my life that I need to fix, but that's about as far as it goes. I feel really convicted for about a total of an hour maybe, and then I just forget about it and continue on with my life. It's like I totally limit God's influence in my life, and I only allow Him in so much. Rather than giving everything over to Him and really trying to change myself for His glory, I get too selfish and focus on what I want to do. I convince myself that doing what God would have me do would just be hard, so I would rather just give up before I even start. I mean I don't consciously admit all of those things, but those are the messages that my actions send to people.
The worst part is, I hate how often I come to this realization. Even today, before small group, I was thinking about how often I see something wrong in my life but don't put forth the full effort to change. It's just terrible! I think this time, I want to make it different. Actually, I know I do. God has done so much for me, and I am learning more and more every day, that it's just ridiculous for me to continue living for myself. Especially when the outcomes and results aren't that great at all. All I gain from living for myself is pain, frustration, anger and discouragement. Living for Christ gives so much more!
It's time I turn this all around.
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